點一盞心燈
Author: Bian Li
Feb 16th, 2001
When I started to like Vicki, it was hard to tell exactly when or why, I could only remember the moment I was attracted by a pair of large and beautiful eyes sparkling so amazingly and vividly. When I started like Vicki, it was kind of superficial about how lovely she was. When I started to like Vicki, it seemed no reason at the beginning, anytime I saw her vivid image and heard her pleasant "Beijing accent", I felt cheerful. When I started to like Vicki, it happened naturally and reasonably, as if it's been predestined as a bond brought from our previous incarnation to the present.
Actually, I always insist that, I am willing to know more about one only when I am interested in him, knowing more of him leads to understanding, accumulated understanding leads to feeling with heart, only when I use my heart to feel the other one of whom I've never met before, both of two hearts will bump together beyond the distance, sharing happiness and sadness with each other. As if in my body I experience two lives. No more loneliness, no more bitterness, no more sole happiness or sorrow that used to be hidden in diary. The world becomes so wonderful, you and me hearts beating together, this is love, this is truth.
Therefore, when I started to like Vicki, I have tried my best to get to know everything about her, mainly from media---newspaper, magazines and TV. Maybe, they are helpful somehow, make I got to know Vicki superficially, but not in an intensive way, just like viewing the flowers in fog. Well, no soon, suddenly, all the media were filled with complex reports and unproved rumors, that made me so much confused, hard to be believed and hard to be understood. What happened in the whole world? Since then, I lost all my trust and dependents on them, I started to hate those nonsense stuffs, those bitchy articles and criticisms and those self-issued "expertise".
Fortunately, God is always fair and just, He knows clearly who has tried his best, who has devoted his heart, hard working won't be denied, sweats, tears and blood won't be scattered in vain. All the efforts will be paid back with great harvest. Every seed containing real heart and true love will sprout, blossom and fruit, and the fruit must be the greatest, prettiest, sweetest, most fragrant and most unforgettable and of course the most cherished one forever.
People with people, we need mutual communication, understanding and tolerance. Some words popped out from two lips cannot make it. We have to experience a long and tough way, not only me but all of us, to support each other, courage each other and trust each other, to construct a flat, straight and warm road for us, where there is a drum
beating that cheer us up----Listen! The sound is from our hearts beating together, our lungs breathing together. Look! It is our common wishes, common future and our common home!
However, I am not just talking, I am trying to treat my parents, friends and myself well. Before that, I didn't know how to express my truth feeling, didn't know how to cherish what I have, now I am growing up, with some experience of life, I start to hold tightly of the passing present, try to grasp every single sparkle and touching in my life, maybe it is what I truly should cherish and hold for whole life, instead of the past, no matter how glorious it used to be, neither the future, which is uneasy to handle now. Only present, it is true. Just like my parents, they have worked hard and given love to me with no regards, as their kid I could never pay back of all the love they've given me, so what I could do is to be a good daughter with all my heart and love, learn to care about them. Also like friends, grown up together, in childhood, teenage and all the wonderful moments, they give me help, courage and company. They are my real friends and sisters,
cheerful and faithful, who I am always longing for, what could be nicer? And like myself, as a college student, I am not mature, not so naive though, but I am still innocent and frank as usual. I am not and impossible to be perfect, but I cherish my heart very much, cause whatever happens, I always want to keep my true heart. Additionally, my life now is busy but full of fun. I am not too sure about what I am learning, but I think I will learn harder, cause I chose my major and I should take the responsibility, so I should be confident and go on the road I've chosen. Still the same words, "Your hard work will be paid back with harvest". Just like Vicki Zhao, she is so much like my elder sister, I cannot help sharing my joy, sadness and any achievement with her. If I could work hard and make progress along with her, if I had a sister like Vicki, I would be so lucky and the world would be more wonderful, and I would burst into laughter in my dreams.
This is a my feeling, some words from a fan to her favorite actress, a voice from a heart to her most trustable friend and also a soliloquy from a younger sister to her elder sister. It is not so beautiful, but each word is filled with my true love from my heart. Maybe, I am not supposed to expose it, but I cannot help crying out "I love you! Forever and ever!"
Believe me, I want a sister like you, Vicki. Because you, in the past, gave me dreams, you in the future will give me yearnings, while at the present, you give me comforts, you give me support and love, and even give me a heart, a seed of warmth, care and fortune...
Tonight, light a lamp in my heart, right here waiting for you.
Translated by Atat (USA)
Edited by Alice (Hong Kong)
